Your link to Northwest Indiana. tm
Your link to Northwest Indiana. tm |
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Power Shopping Thomas is soooo MAGNETIC!!!! But first, let me apologize for my tardiness in writing a more current article. Things were ‘out of my control’ as you will see by continuing to read this article. Now back to magnetism… This past month has grated on Thomas’ last nerve! Anytime I walked, drove, (or breathed) by something ‘electronic’, sparks flew, alarms went off, computers refused to perform, freezers ceased to freeze, car alarms blared, ‘eye-beam’ doors denied entry, and the worst…the magnetic strip on three of my credit cards were erased! Here is just one ‘magnetic’ day 3 weeks ago that set the tone for the remainder of the month. At 8:00am on a Saturday morning, I started to type my new article. It was all about me missing my anniversary of writing this column (first article was March, 1, 2000). I was typing the first line when the computer started to ‘go haywire’. The screen was filled with error messages, the dreaded ‘blue box’, a scary ‘black box’, and a frozen mouse. I tried to fix it but reason said to take it to an expert…so I did. Then I went shopping. I walked into the TJ Maxx in Hobart, Indiana and set off the security gate alarm. You know the one, if they forgot to remove the security tag says; ”pardon us, but someone must have forgotten to remove the inventory protection tag”. I looked around to see who was trying to steal something and realized that it was me that set it off. The manager on duty realized it was Thomas. I told her that I was walking INTO the store, not OUT of it! She said; “Oh Thomas, it is just your animal ‘magnetism’ that caused the alarm to go off. We both chuckled, but I said it was probably my cell phone that set it off. She said many car keys with remote openers also set it off. I finished shopping and sure enough…it went off as I exited the building. My next destination was Meijer Department Store. I sauntered into the building, past the ‘inventory control device’ and it happened again…alarms sounded! The ‘greeter’ at the door stated; do you have a cell phone (I purposely left it in the car) or a ‘pace maker’. “A ‘pace maker’”, I screamed…just how old do you think I am? The security guard (Thomas nicknamed him Barney Fife) approached me. I told him that I was walking into the store, not out of it. “It must be my ‘animal magnetism’”, I proclaimed. Barney was not amused! I had visions of a strip search, but the ‘greeter’ assured Barney that Thomas was legit. I finished my shopping, and exited the store…again setting off the alarm. I went to Burlington Coat Factory…same thing…alarms…whistles…another Barney Fife. This time though, I had Barney take my keys and walk them through the inventory control…nothing! Then I had him take my cell phone through…nothing! Then I took off my belt and shoes and had him walk those through…nothing! Then I took off my wristwatch, my shirt, and my pants and had him walk those through…nothing! I put everything back on and walked past the inventory control unit…it goes off like fireworks! The manager who also knows me starts laughing and says; “Thomas, it must be something in your chemical makeup.” “Oh great, I stated, NOW my DNA is magnetized.” “I just can’t wait to go through airport security…I will be on the terrorist list”. I had one last stop, Office Depot in Hobart. You guessed it, I walked in and the alarm goes off. I looked at the manager who was standing at the door and said, “Screw it”! Thomas turned around, got back in his car, and drove home. This story repeats itself every day for the remainder of May. If it weren’t against the law, I would just walk into every store, gas station, and airport…completely nude! Now, about my computer! Did I get it fixed, you ask? Oh, please…you people should do ‘stand up comedy’! I have had the worst experience with DELL computers this past month. I have spent over 30.5 hours with 12 technicians and 4 customer service agents in India. I have replaced the memory board, hard drive, and a host of other parts. The 10th technicians sent me ‘the box’ and I sent back the entire unit and ‘supposedly’ they replaced the motherboard. And this is on a new computer! It still didn’t work and Thomas became ‘unglued’! The 11th technician contacted me twice to see if I was still having ‘difficulties’ with the unit. He, too, should do ‘stand-up comedy! I called the 1-800 number again and I was put in touch with the 12th technician. I stated that this should not be this difficult. He said he would get back to me with and wanted to restore my faith in DELL. When pigs fly! My final attempt in contacting DELL was the Wednesday before Memorial Day. I was disconnected 5 times, ‘told off’ by a customer service agent (what does that tell you?), and told (via email by the 12th technician) not to call the 1-800 number, but to wait for his call or email. I am still waiting! So Thomas got out his OOOLLLLDDDD computer and typed this article. And just what will Thomas do about the situation? Hmmm, it isn’t nice to fool with Thomas. I have contacted my lawyer and composed a letter to the president of Dell and to each of the board of directors. The letter goes out Tuesday after Memorial Day unless DELL comes through. If that doesn’t work…Thomas files a lawsuit against DELL. I think Thomas, CEO of DELL, has a nice ring to it, don’t you? And now… DON’T DOUBT THOMAS! THINK STAINLESS STEEL GAS GRILL! Target [nationwide] has a stainless steel gas grill, by Thermos, on sale for $297.99. It has 585 sq. in. cooking surface with 3 porcelain cast-iron burners and electronic ignition. Assembly is required and the gas tank is sold separately. They also have a stainless steel serving cart, with 2 built-in coolers, for $97.99. All other stainless steel gas grills are 10% off. THINK GAS GRILLS AT SEARS! Sears [nationwide] has a Kenmore Quantum gas grill on sale for $189.99. It also has 3 burners. THINK CONCRETE LANDSCAPE BLOCKS! Menard [nationwide] has concrete landscape blocks on sale for $1.29 each. The two styles listed are 4”H x 7” W x 9”D pyzique in tan or gray AND 2”H x 12” square brickface in red or tan. If you need indoor/outdoor carpet, Menard has lawn green @ 19cents per square foot. THINK LUGGAGE! Wal*Mart [nationwide] has a ‘special buy’ on a 5-piece set of luggage by American Tourister. For $88.64, you get a 24-inch & a 28-inch expandable upright, a 19-inch carry-on upright, garment carrier, tote, and a bonus 24-inch wheeled duffel. THINK DIGITAL CAMERAS! Thomas is always in the market for the latest in digital cameras. Office Depot [nationwide] has a Canon PowerShot SD400 digital ELPH digital camera for $399.99. Currently there is a $50.00 mail-in rebate. This camera features a 3X optical zoom and 11X digital zoom. It also accepts SD memory cards. There are a host of other cameras on sale. THINK MEN’S CAREER FASHIONS! Value City Department Stores [nationwide] is currently having a sale in their men’s department. The entire stock of men’s suits that are normally $99.99, are on sale for $79.99. $40 dress pants are $19.99. Dress shirts and ties are also on sale. Think Father’s Day! And just what I do to celebrate my Power Shopping anniversary? Booked at trip to China and Tibet! Hey, someone has to live my charmed life. Yes, Power Shopping fans, in just a few weeks I will be taking one-month tour of China and Tibet. But don’t fret, Thomas will be emailing in his articles just like last year. The last time I was in China, the shopping was ‘fantastic’ and I will be going to a shopper’s paradise…Hong Kong! Thomas
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